Wacipi's Rembrances

I am not very good at this everyone, but it is my extremely sad duty to let you all know that our dear Wacipi has passed away. It was evident that he was not well the past couple of weeks and that there was at least one mass, if not more, in his abdomen.

This past Tuesday Dr. Michelle came out to the sanctuary and she too was concerned. Wacipi has been losing weight and not eating well the past few days. She took blood for testing but the results are not back yet. We were waiting for the results but Saturday it was obvious he was getting too weak. As we take the wolves for walks on Saturday, we took Wacipi for a very short one because he so looked forward to going. Little did we know that it would be his last, but I'm glad Marilyn got to take him because it made him very happy to go even for a very short one.

Sunday Wacipi could barely stand, he could not keep water down and was totally uninterested in eating. Jean called Dr. Michelle. Although it was Sunday and she was 2 hours aways, out of town with her family, she dropped everything and came straight to the sanctuary. She had said she could not be there until between 3 and 3:30 - she arrived at 2:40 - she must have flown. God bless her.

There were a number of us along with Jean at his side the entire afternoon with our hands on him, telling him how much he was loved and trying to keep him calm and help him on his journey. I think it was the opposite though and that he helped keep us calm. He was ready to go and let us know that.

From what we observed, although weak, he did not seem in any pain. Dr. Michelle confirmed her diagnosis when she arrived as the mass seemed to have grown larger and harder in just a few days - tumors on the spleen she said. There was no sense making him wait for test results as in the end it would be the same and no one felt he could make it another 24 hours. If we waited any longer, he would have started to suffer and we could not let that happen.

The Dr. along with those of us there helped him in the most peaceful passing I have ever been present for. He was ready and just relaxed into it. There was no fear, no anxiety, no pain - just peace and tranquility. If there is such a thing as the perfect passing, this was it.

We all believe that Wacipi has now joined his beloved Timbre ('Grandmother' as we affectionately called her) and the two of them are joyously renewing their long companionship. I know she has been waiting patiently for her boy to come to her. I am happy for them.

Wacipi knew so much love at the sanctuary that his last years, I am convinced, have been the happiest of his life. I do have such wonderful memories of him when he was younger though. Rae, Jenna and I knew him for about 4 years or so before he came here and he used to like to 'play' with us. In the beginning we were naive and did not know we should not let him, or any others, do this. He would jump on us and sometimes knock us down and grab arms or legs and tug, all the while looking at us with those amazing eyes of his. He accepted us as one of his own and, although we sometimes came away with bruises and such, we felt honored to have been accepted so completely by him that he wanted to play with us like he played with Timbre.

Jean has given all of the wolves and wolf-dogs at the sanctuary the opportunity to have the last years of their lives, whether 1 or 20, be the best they've ever known. For Jean's unwavering dedication, for all of the board members, the volunteers, sponsors and our exceptional vet, Dr. Michelle, I know I am eternally grateful, as are the wolves, for your devotion to their happiness and wellbeing. Thank you all so very much.

It has been an honor and a privilege to know and to be loved by Wacipi and I am grateful that he is now where he will know only joy. I am certain I will see him again one day and that he will welcome me by jumping on me, knocking me down, grabbing an arm and then tugging - I can't wait!

Words always seem rather inadequate at times such as these but your words about Wacipi are so eloquent and full of love that I can see him so very clearly knocking you down and all that fun stuff; he had such a gentleness about him that I’m not surprised you felt he was “safe” to play with. I will remember him as that dear devoted companion to Grandmother. Yes, they are together now, free from all pain but forever will he remember those humans who took such good care of him. If you feel a tugging in the night, that will be him!

I am so very deeply saddened by this news, but I know as you say, that Wacipi had a beautiful life at the sanctuary. Please pass along my sympathy to Jean and everyone else and know that you all are always in my prayers.

I know you will already know how hard it is for me to hear of the loss of Wacipi. I am deeply, deeply saddened but feel so privileged to have met such a wonderful creature.

It is strange (or perhaps not so) but prior to your email, the sanctuary has been very vividly in my thoughts over the last few days, so much so that on this very Sunday just gone I had bought a card to send to you all. Even the Atlantic ocean will not separate those we become close to.

In the skeptical scientific world I now work, it is increasingly hard to allow spirituality to flourish, but in my heart i will always have the wolves of Texas. Saint Francis sanctuary is a place which has undoubtedly changed my life.

I miss you all,

All my love,
NICKY

Oh, Janet, I just read your beautiful message about our sweet Wacipi's passing. I could hardly read the words for the tears, but the way you worded it made it much easier for all of us, since you said he had a peaceful passing. Jean had called me earlier to tell me he was probably not going to make it through the day, and I felt so awful about not being able to come out to help. You and Jenna and Rae were so privileged to have known Wacipi as long as you did, and I will always think of him running and playing with you. We are all blessed to be able to be with these wonderful spiritual creatures, and I am convinced that they do much more for us than we could ever do for them. They have helped save my spiritual life, as has Jean. I love you all dearly and have such respect for all the work you do at the sanctuary. Hope to see you soon. Give my best to all. Love, Christa

Dear Janet - thank you for letting me know... I am so glad Wacipi had these last happy years, and was surrounded by those who loved him when he left us. I am sure he is with his beloved Timbre, and his brother Yukon in the great beyond - roughhousing as he always did! I have a few stitches to remember him by - he was always such a great big silly boy, who had no idea how big and strong he was! I fear that the (prior sanctuary) survivors are getting old along with the rest of us, and we must not be too surprised when they start to leave us... but their years with Jean have more than made up for the unhappy times which went before. I have never seen such happy and pampered wolves, so we must not be too sad. They are running free now...